So many things have happened in recent times, many mood swings, bouts of doubt and peak happiness. I failed to be constant in the storage of writing this, but I think it is because it is no longer a novelty, is part of the agenda, we are now a couple for almost seven months, and we see almost every day .
Things to remember are my 'promotion' work, and then the extension of my stay in China, at least until he will be here, my weekend in Xi'An, with two gentlemen, as he came out with the other and chatted a bit 'with Alessia, which of course the next day I called her to refer everything. He said he told her that we are young, we must grasp every opportunity, and that was a good opportunity for me to work my business. And he wants to return to Argentina, and try to keep contacts with China to work, "But Then Ele?". So worries about me, thinking about his future mean. At least not the only one to do so.
Another little thing to note is that two weeks ago sent me an email asking me to send him a photo of me that I like. In the evening we met at Qbar and I asked him what he needed, even if it was for the application of something, maybe the ticket for the journey. He told me that it is for private use, because it does not even a photo of me. How sweet! 
other news, this time really huge, is that there Sunday at the exact prossimaaaaaaaaaaa !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! At the end we go to Thailand, because due to a misunderstanding with G. the agency has no more tickets available for less than $ 2000 in Hawai'i. I for my part are really happy because it was too expensive and was not clearly defined my future at the time, so I looked a little 'something risky to spend so much of my savings (and in March I have 6 more months' rent) .
We remain there until 11, Koh Chang to begin with, then if we find a place (not to be believed, it's all booked !!!), we will move to another island, ending two days of shopping in Bangkok and then return. I can not wait! It 's the first time that I leave in a cool place, especially in winter when we're freezing! I'll come back all tanned give me give me!
Then in the program but just feasible for reasons of holiday and we would have seen the Vietnam along with a couple of friends ... but I've always wanted to make Hawai'i too expensive. I really hope to go to Vietnam! It's so cool!
Another little thing ... ... ... Saturday evening we went to a place that is not usually our style, not because it's ugly, but because it is very expensive and there is a Colombian band that plays Latin American, but the two girls go get the people sitting to dance and there is nobody standing! But on Saturday there was a party and was full of people so we went. A Latin American like me, but I was ashamed to dance in front of the professor, because there were lessons because they are all excellent, I will not have much, especially if they are sober and in front of someone I like.
I finally decided and I dragged the first G., and C. I was also smart because they are both so negative that at least no one noticed me.
Then ... Ta-daaaa. A. asked me to dance. Ahahahaah I did not want to believe, but then he really did. I swear, I would not bet a chip only knew that even just take a step, it seems so hard!! But ... Not only is he gets to know the steps and salsa, but he was great!! I led him back to mind the revolutions I learned the speedy course of eight years ago and I must say we had a terrible figure! I wanted to shout for someone to film or take pictures, but none did. What a pity ... Then I thanked her for having danced with him and teaching him (I ... 
???), and we kiss and cuddle a bit in front of everyone .... What we never do.
And these are the peaks ...
But there are also low moments, unfortunately ... For example, last weekend told me that he is not sleeping well, and was made to give some medicine. Then from there told me that two years ago was not sleeping at night if not for an hour three weeks, until Maggie's mother gave him the pads very effective. He told me he was very sad when it is so she can not sleep. The question I have not done but he said the same thing, told me that now is not sad or depressed, but a bit 'gloomy ... .
Well, I'm un'insicura, and I am sorry to know that the person I'm not happy, and it makes it a bit 'me too sad. So we get into a club that does not make us good. And this causes me nightmares ... ... so real that when you wake up I can not even look at him and I can not hold back the tears a bit 'a little relief from the' fear that can happen and I really feel this way.
Ale and I had gone to his house, I had samples to show him, and I was all excited because I had a lot of news to report. We were in the bedroom, in a house big and bright that no guesses anything with her and I was sitting on the bed, bent down to rummage in a bag, with her back to port. He was standing at the foot of the bed, in boxers and T-shirt. I turned to give samples and a Russian girl, blonde with bangs and entered into a shower room in version soon. I was a lightning strike, I pushed away Ale that was on my way and I got to give him a slap against reckless with all my might, perhaps one that I have not pulled after a night of Halloween. But he was too tall and big, I could not give him a slap as they should, but only small slaps that were not enough to vent all my anger and my hatred, all the yelling and I got on the step at the end of the bed to get better, but still unable to give him the slap that I wanted, the ones that sound is also hurt. And he did a turn, saying something like, sorry but I do not do more lightly, without really thinking.
Then I walked into the living room and I was back bent over a bag to collect all my stuff and he came and sat on the couch and started playing with the XBox. I spit on all my anger and disappointment, reminding me that I was trustworthy, that I had forgiven him and we were falling back! And he, laughing , said: "Ha ha ha. I know you care too much about me, Ele. I mean, I was implying that he knew that I would not have had the strength to let it go and then he knew he had so much power over me to be able to do all the fucking she wanted. I said laughing at these words are no longer able to finish my sentence, I was really shocked and in disbelief, and of course so hurt that I've gone to the bathroom while I told him he would see if I would not have gone and I would never have to even try. I had to rinse her face when she joined the girl in the bathroom (completely different, dressed like schoolgirl, blonde hair long without fringe, with glasses). About Us cordially, and then she asks me my number, to which I say that this seems a bit 'too much. And then I notice a piece of paper, close to the mirror of the basin, with a strange phrase, what the hell I can not remember. But it ended in the name of Maggie, and the phrase meant something, I just know that I was a bit 'relieved, because it could be interpreted to give a perfectly plausible explanation of what had happened.
I woke up in darkness, still clutching his brains and trying to understand why that girl was there if not for a little innocent, and then I was thinking that it was out of the shower and that neither had denied in front of my fury murderer, and that, in any event, even if they had shown that nothing had happened, he was a perfect asshole and I would never be able to watch it the same way, knowing that it could be.
piangiucchiando Thinking about all this when I turned I saw him beside me, asleep. I quickly looked away, confused. And finally I began to realize that I had dreamed.
I took Magone and I sat up to try to calm myself, I had my heart pounding and the lump in my throat. I called down not to wake him and gave him another peek. He woke up because of my movements and took my hand and I instinctively I held my stiff. It took me all night to convince me that really had not said those words and recapitalization that is very unlikely that such a thing, for this I am convinced rationally.
The next morning I was still upset, and from time to time I could with tears. He noticed that I had something but I could not tell if the dream, part I wanted to do, to make him understand the things that make me unsure of him so that he might face an examination of conscience, because he's the guy who thinks about it then. But also seemed to love him remember his mistake, and the history of Halloween and when I have forgiven him, I also said I did not want to reset everything and then pull it out.
Now he is on a business trip and will return tomorrow. In these two days I have dedicated myself to the things that usually when he's not got time to do (cleaning, mail, blogs, photos, ...) and I'm glad to have had this 'pause' for myself.
Now of course I miss him already. Before leaving, she left me three sweaters that have restricted them to him in the laundry and I put back in place, he said it was the most beautiful Christmas present he could receive.
In any case, we are fortunate because we have the cure for my insecurity and doubts about its future: it is called Koh Chang, and let's start with Sunday 
. ลาก่อน! (Goodbye!)
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